It seems like I misspoke last week: it's not yet Group C's turn on The Masked Singer, it's Group A again! Which actually fits me better because, as I said before, if there are too long breaks between two appearances by the same singer, I tend to forget everything about them, including if I even liked them the first time. So hopefully this won't happen this season, and it really shouldn't, now that I have the best documented notes and clues I ever wrote for this show. So without further ado, Group A, Part 2!
Popcorn
Right at the beginning of her package, Popcorn said something really strange: "I picked the Popcorn costume because I wanted to step far out of my comfort zone". Now either this is just badly worded, in which case I'm definitely reading too much into it, but this makes it sound like she's not just talking about the show itself, but the costume specifically. Which would mean that it's someone who... hates fast food? Yeah, that's not much to go on. More interesting was the clue that she was sick as a child - couldn't eat or sleep, had severe anxiety, and felt like she was in an emotional prison. This fact, coupled with the huge glittering rainbow flag makes me thing she was in the closet for a long time. True, she also dropped an "I survived" in there because very obviously we're supposed to think it's Gloria Gaynor, but it's not. She's just as great of a singer, though: I wasn't convinced last week, but she bought me now with a truly beautiful performance of a Harry Styles. What else... various small things and objects, like four cats (the musical?), candles shaping the number 16 (the movie?), a Rubik's cube, a hair straightener (or curler... I genuinely don't know which). And then, via the newly introduced device of drone-delivered clues, we got the planet Venus with the hint "the second rock from the sun is far away, but it should bring you closer to me". One more thing that could be interesting is that admittedly, her favourite part in the contest so far was flirting with Nick, so maybe she WAS talking about him last week, instead of making a pun or something. They probably know each other well, but does that help anyone else? Definitely not me. The only thing after all this that I could think of was that famous song from the 90s called Venus, so I looked up if it was anyone famous who sang it, but nah. I also like Jenny's guess that Venus is a clue that is supposed to lead us to someone else named Williams, like Vanessa... but I also have the feeling that there has to be more to it than that.
Giraffe
Giraffe didn't really woo me the first time but I was ready to start liking him now, provided he didn't rap again. He started his package by telling us that he's happy to be doing this show because he really needed some fun in his life right now. My cynical side immediately went "oh no, poor celebrity not having enough fun while earning his millions a day :(", but then I chided myself because while I do really hate it when famous people pretend that they're oh so relatable and "just like us", they are still humans who can have bad times. As if to make me feel more ashamed, Giraffe went into some pretty dark details about how "recently his whole world came crashing down". He kept it mostly secret, but his life was "transformed in the blink of an eye". He had a "terrifying episode", after which he could barely walk or talk... oh my. The first person who came to my mind after this was Timothy Omundson, who had a stroke not so long ago and didn't really talk about it until his role in This Is Us made it timely to do so. But then, he has (or used to have) a great singing voice (I still miss you, Galavant), and also he's a bit older, so this ain't him. To be fair, Giraffe did sing this time, but it really wasn't anything special. Nor could I decipher much from his other clues, including a fox/Wayne Brady, eating peaches, and a 4-4 domino tile, which is somehow very important to him.
Snow Owls
Oh, these two. They sang a ballad again, which was fine, but nothing mindblowing. The judges are riding the married couple idea really hard, which seems a bit strange to me, considering that their first clue was about how when he was going through a messy breakup, and got "swept up in an avalanche of emotions", she was there for him. I mean I guess they could have gotten together afterwards, but I still think they're more likely to be siblings or best friends. Another instance of them helping each other out was when she had "an opportunity fit for a queen that I was too scared to do", and he encouraged her to go for it. Other than this their package was mostly a bunch of random images that I'm sure are all puns, somehow: a D neon sign with a cord and plug (un-plug-D?), an anchor with MANagement written on it, and a basketball with DAL. Also, a bouncy castle and a witch's hat. I'm mightily confused.
Sun
Lots of interesting things in here that I wish meant anything to me: a glowing red hourglass with a spider crawling on it, a blue heart-shaped butterfly, a cauldron, candy canes, a lock of hair tied with a blue ribbon... I mean, what? It didn't help that she had to grow up in a fractured home, and is now seemingly burning ugly rumours about herself. That could be literally anyone in Hollywood. The drone-delivered (magic) eight ball doesn't clear things up either, it just adds even more to the witchy-magical vibes the package had.
In the end it was a well-deserved sendoff for the Giraffe, he was the only one who was really sticking out here as not being too much of a singer. And his name is... Brian Austin Green. Oh, I always love it when it's someone the judges didn't think of, it makes the unmasking so much more fun.
Now, I do know this guy, although not from where apparently I'm supposed to. Everyone in the sudio freaked out because he was on Beverly Hills 90210 and so the judges came close to guessing him (but went for his co-star instead), and I also know that that show is super huge and important in modern American pop culture, but I'm just a tiny bit too young to have watched it when it aired (I'm not even sure it made it to my country back then, to be honest), and I never felt like I should remedy that later. But I did love how when Jenny asked him what all the peaches meant in the clue package he was all outraged like, "what do you mean what they meant, the Peach Pit!!!" And then all the judges went "Oh my Gooooddd!" and I was just sitting here like... is that... something famous... I've never heard of it... But in the spirit of always learning new things, I looked it up and apparently it was an important location in the TV show. I guess it might be to teen dramas what Central Perk is to sitcoms. Maybe.
So anyway, the reason I know Brian Austin Green is because he was in Desperate Housewives for a short time as Bree's too-young boyfriend (forgot the name but now I know it's Keith, thanks IMDb) who once gave her three orgasms in one night. That meant a lot to me as a 17-18 year old watching the show, so yeah I remember it vividly. Also he was really hot and I was sad when the character had to go, but even back then I had no idea he was a big-name TV star. Apperently he's also Robin Thicke's bestie, and yet he didn't get any of his highlighted clues such as the carnival theme referencing a rap album of his (oh, remember when last time I joked that the big risk he took that made him the butt of many jokes was probably when he became a rapper? I was totally just taking the piss but apparently it's true, that's what he meant!), the racing because he won something called the "celebrity grand prix" in 2010, and the domino because he has four sons. Aww. They might have also guessed it from the fox because he used to be married to Megan Fox, but no one got that either. I did, however, correctly identify one clue in part 1: when he said he was "in knots", that was because before BH90210 he was in another show called Knots Landing... so I knew he said it for a reason, I just didn't know why, exactly. Also I still don't understand why they don't list ALL the clues at the end of each episode. I only know about this one, because, again, IMDb. I wonder how many other fun things they didn't inform me about because they keep explaining the ones that make zero sense. Like even today, instead of the rap album or car race I would prefer to know what his deal was with the huge terrifying incident, that seemed pretty fucking important to me. Why do I have to look it up myself? Do I even care enough to do so? Well, NOW I do! Bye, see you next week!
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